So Christmas is over. Thank goodness.
Don't get me wrong - I appreciate Christmas and all it stands for. I just have no Christmas joy like others do, I guess. I am not sure I ever have either. I try. We went to Beef & Boards production of "A Christmas Carol" (our 3rd time seeing it). We went to Chicago to see the lights at the zoo. We went to our church's special Christmas programs. I put a tree up, made some cookies, wrapped presents.......but I was just going through the motions.
Depressing, isn't it?
However, despite my lack of Christmas cheer, I did have a good Christmas. I feel like I have eaten more than I care to admit but it isn't the end of the world. What I eat between Christmas and New Year's is not as relevant as what I eat between New Year's and Christmas. Therefore, I partook in my share of cookies, puddings and carbs. My body is letting me know that I was naughty but that's okay.
We do have a few traditions that we continue on no matter where my kids are in life or their ages. One is that we always have cinnamon rolls Christmas morning. One year I decided not to do cinnamon rolls. and on Christmas Eve my kids were asking where they were. Once I said I decided not to make them that year, they were not happy with me. My husband took our dog out to potty and was gone longer than normal. When he returned, he had a small foil pan with a bow on it. Some older gentleman saw him outside and handed it to him with a Merry Christmas saying he was handing out goodies throughout the area. My first thought was - freak, but we put them in the fridge with no thought and not even looking to see what it was.
I had forgotten about them and when I remembered, I peeked under the foil and guess what was there? Cinnamon rolls - 4 of them! Who gives out cinnamon rolls?? My kids and I chalk it up to an angel, believe what you will. God knew how much 4 cinnamon rolls meant to my kids and our Christmas and since I foolishly neglected them, He brought them to us.
Another is that Matt always hands out the gifts. This year my kids asked why Matt always did it. I didn't really have a specific answer other than my dad always did it growing up. It was like the man of the house hands them out. It may be weird but that is the way it has always been.
Something else we have always done is the kids open first and alternate. My son would open one, then my daughter, then son, etc. I do this so that they can appreciate what they got, they can thank whomever bought it and they take a moment to not think just about what they are getting but to appreciate what everyone has gotten. Then Matt and I open ours. It slows down the moment. The morning is not just a frenzy of paper and bows but of taking our time and appreciating each moment.
Also, our kids have never believed in Santa Claus. Ever. I cannot remember a time I have ever believed in him and I just never passed it on to my kids. I just didn't want to lie to my kids for the first impressionable years of their lives. My family said I took away from the magic of Christmas and others would say I was being a Grinch. Funny.....my kids never said - "Man I wished we believed in Santa." They enjoyed the holiday and made memories.
Lastly, even though my kids didn't believe in Santa, I still waited until they were asleep and filled their stockings. They would wake up before me and find their stockings filled with candy and surprises. While they always knew it was us doing it, they never questioned us as to why we do it. It was always just something fun for them to wake to and tied them over until we opened gifts.
With that being said - we had cinnamon rolls, we patiently took turns opening the gifts as Matt passed them out and while my kids never gave credit to some fictitious, jolly dude. they woke to filled stockings.
Christmas time brings the blues for most, present author included. I miss my dad, I miss the times I used to have with family (whom I didn't see one of them this year for the holiday) and I feel like time is just passing me by while I sit idle. However, as I sat and played cards for hours with my kids.....I can't help by have a full heart.
Friday, December 26, 2014
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
The Gauntlet's Been Dropped
I often wonder if people get sick of hearing about my journey to a healthier me. Then I snap out of it and say to myself - I don't care if they are! I am proud of what I have accomplished and I have hopes to inspire others to take the steps to become the healthiest they can be!
So with that being said, I ran my first 5k on Thanksgiving. While most of you were waking to the smell of turkey cooking and pies cooling, I woke up to a bowl of oatmeal and tennis shoes.
I didn't think I would be so nervous, but I was. I had thoughts that I would do terrible. That I would get going and have to stop, walk or crawl and look a fool. Or maybe I would just throw my hands up and say 'forget this!'. Once I got there, however, all my apprehension melted away as I saw all ages, sizes and fitness levels. There was a buzz of excitement as people milled around waiting for the race to start.
Me, having never done a 5k before, just stood there like a fool. Then I thought that perhaps I should get my music all ready. I had just bought an arm band, and was ready to just zone out. Needless to say, I couldn't get the stupid thing on just right and once I did, the race started (which I wasn't even aware of until I saw the wave of people around me moving). Then my music stopped. So I ran the entire race with no music and my headphones in my hands because I had no pockets. Fantastic.
So, I had one goal and one goal only - to beat my fellow runner (no need to mention names here, he knows who he is!). I saw him ahead of me after the first 5 minutes. I kept him in my line of sight.
One mile passed and I actually felt pretty good. I thought to myself, I got this. A woman jogged up next to me. She looked fit and looked the part with her running outfit, headphones (her music was working just fine) and running shoes. She asked if she could pace herself with me and I thought - seriously? I feel like a stampeding rhino and you wanna run with me? She spoke with ease while I wheezed and puffed out a meager - "yea, sure".
As I turned a corner, I took that moment to push a little harder and soon passed he-who-shall-not-be-named. I was in the zone. When I run, I typically am unaware of nothing else other than what I am doing. This was my first time running outside. However, on the treadmill I break it down into sections - 1 mile, 2 miles, 3 miles then the .10 mile. Here, I had no idea where I was. All I kept doing was looking straight ahead and focusing on pushing through. I kept telling myself - "You got this. You can do this. You are doing this. You have done this before on the treadmill. Don't stop." That was a big one because a couple times, I just wanted to stop and walk like some others were doing. However, I knew if I did that getting back up to a good pace would be near impossible. I just had to keep trucking.
It was a good thing that I didn't have music because he-who-shall-not-be-named was behind me. I could hear him catching up and everytime I thought he was close, I would push through a little harder and get a few more feet between us. The finish line was soon in my sights and I could hear him getting closer. I pushed with everything I had (and feared falling on my face) and finished with him right behind me.
I did it! The high I felt was unreal. I just ran a 5k; I just ran 3.1 miles. I was a runner! Say what?! Seriously, I look back on this journey and never thought I would be here.
Granted, I still hate running. I don't think I will ever like it. But I like the challenge, I like the competition (even with myself) and I like the feeling of empowerment I get.
I am running another one this weekend. The gauntlet has been dropped. I have a feeling I am going to have to push even harder because someone will make it his mission to beat me this time around.
Challenge accepted.
By the way - my time was 31.24; which blew my mind. He-who-shall-not-be-named? 31.26 - that's right.....2 seconds!
So with that being said, I ran my first 5k on Thanksgiving. While most of you were waking to the smell of turkey cooking and pies cooling, I woke up to a bowl of oatmeal and tennis shoes.
I didn't think I would be so nervous, but I was. I had thoughts that I would do terrible. That I would get going and have to stop, walk or crawl and look a fool. Or maybe I would just throw my hands up and say 'forget this!'. Once I got there, however, all my apprehension melted away as I saw all ages, sizes and fitness levels. There was a buzz of excitement as people milled around waiting for the race to start.
Me, having never done a 5k before, just stood there like a fool. Then I thought that perhaps I should get my music all ready. I had just bought an arm band, and was ready to just zone out. Needless to say, I couldn't get the stupid thing on just right and once I did, the race started (which I wasn't even aware of until I saw the wave of people around me moving). Then my music stopped. So I ran the entire race with no music and my headphones in my hands because I had no pockets. Fantastic.
So, I had one goal and one goal only - to beat my fellow runner (no need to mention names here, he knows who he is!). I saw him ahead of me after the first 5 minutes. I kept him in my line of sight.
One mile passed and I actually felt pretty good. I thought to myself, I got this. A woman jogged up next to me. She looked fit and looked the part with her running outfit, headphones (her music was working just fine) and running shoes. She asked if she could pace herself with me and I thought - seriously? I feel like a stampeding rhino and you wanna run with me? She spoke with ease while I wheezed and puffed out a meager - "yea, sure".
As I turned a corner, I took that moment to push a little harder and soon passed he-who-shall-not-be-named. I was in the zone. When I run, I typically am unaware of nothing else other than what I am doing. This was my first time running outside. However, on the treadmill I break it down into sections - 1 mile, 2 miles, 3 miles then the .10 mile. Here, I had no idea where I was. All I kept doing was looking straight ahead and focusing on pushing through. I kept telling myself - "You got this. You can do this. You are doing this. You have done this before on the treadmill. Don't stop." That was a big one because a couple times, I just wanted to stop and walk like some others were doing. However, I knew if I did that getting back up to a good pace would be near impossible. I just had to keep trucking.
It was a good thing that I didn't have music because he-who-shall-not-be-named was behind me. I could hear him catching up and everytime I thought he was close, I would push through a little harder and get a few more feet between us. The finish line was soon in my sights and I could hear him getting closer. I pushed with everything I had (and feared falling on my face) and finished with him right behind me.
I did it! The high I felt was unreal. I just ran a 5k; I just ran 3.1 miles. I was a runner! Say what?! Seriously, I look back on this journey and never thought I would be here.
Granted, I still hate running. I don't think I will ever like it. But I like the challenge, I like the competition (even with myself) and I like the feeling of empowerment I get.
I am running another one this weekend. The gauntlet has been dropped. I have a feeling I am going to have to push even harder because someone will make it his mission to beat me this time around.
Challenge accepted.
By the way - my time was 31.24; which blew my mind. He-who-shall-not-be-named? 31.26 - that's right.....2 seconds!
 |
| I finished! |
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| We did it! |
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