My cat, Kyra, was a special cat. I wanted a cat in January of 2006. Now, if you know anything about animals, winter is not a good time to be on the look out for a kitten. It didn't change the fact that I wanted one. I knew I didn't want a calico (they tend to be mean) and would prefer a male because females can be more temperamental. Therefore we began our search. We checked the papers, nothing. We checked local shelters, nothing. I was getting frustrated. I suppose I could have waited until spring but if you know anything about me - when I get something in my head, I want it then and there.
So, my husband extended his search. We found a shelter about 45 minutes away who said they had a couple kittens. We got in our vehicle and drove there immediately. It was a small shelter but it was a nice place with hospitable staff. When we went into the 'cat' room there was a small kennel with two kittens in it. One was a female calico and the other was a male orange cat. I immediately knew I wanted the orange tabby. I always wanted a fat, orange cat. So, I reached my hand in and grabbed him only to have the devil himself channel from the pits of hell and into that little orange fluff. I tossed it into the kennel but not before getting a few battle wounds. No, I don't believe I will be taking THAT one.
I sighed, disappointed that I wouldn't be getting a kitten today. Then, I looked at the calico. She was cute with fluffy hair and big eyes. But she was everything I didn't want. Determined I would settle if need be, I reached in and scooped her up. Immediately, she cuddled against my neck and was purring. I fell in love with her right then and there.
When we got her, we had 2 other cats and shortly after we got a puppy. But she was my special little girl. We had a bond that frustrated my kids because they wanted to play with her and cuddle with her but she wanted nothing to do with them.
She was certainly not your average cat. I am sure she thought I was her mother and she was my child. When I got up in the morning, she would be sitting outside my bedroom door. When I left, she would walk around the house looking for me. When I didn't give her enough attention, she would meow loudly making it clear she wanted it undivided. She would sit in the middle of the room and watch me as I went about my day. Once I sat down, she immediately sprung from the floor into my lap and would make herself very comfortable. She would lick my hand then put her paw on my palm and curl it in a motion that made me think SHE was petting ME. On the rare occasion that she would just sit next to me on the couch (opposed to on me), she would stretch out one paw so it was touching me. If I moved, she would move to ensure her paw was touching me in some way.
She loved bbq pork rinds and she would make herself sick on cheese puffs if I let her. When I would call out her name, she would mew in response as if to say "here I am!". I would lay on the couch and she would lay on my back or side. She would completely melt into me. There were many times I would wake up to her laying on her side and resting her head on my arm like one of my children. So when I say she was special - she was. Matt would often say how ridiculous it was when she would lay in my arms like a baby or curl up against my neck. I think he was jealous - haha.
She was a little girl. She was barely tipping the scale at 6 pounds. She was long-haired and cute as a button. I was so in love with her that I often said I couldn't imagine my life without her.
Awhile back she got a flea infestation that was pretty bad, thanks to my dog. I thought I was going to lose her and that scared me. I couldn't take her to the vet because, as much as she loved me, she would tear me apart when I tried to put her in a box to take her. So I did everything in my power to treat her. The dog was treated via the vet but with Kyra I had to do what I could and eventually she bounced back. Fleas can kill a cat. Especially small ones. They drink so much of the animal's blood that the animal becomes anemic and can't replace the blood cells quick enough. It happens mostly in smaller cats or elderly ones.
So everything was back to normal. I went on vacation for 10 days with my kids at the end of June and Kyra was a wreck without me that long. She did not adjust well. Then I went on a vacation for 4 days with my family and when we got back, Kyra made it known that she missed me by not leaving my side.
This past week, she went from this vivacious kitten to just slinking around the house. While I found this odd, I didn't really think nothing of it. She tended to have mood swings (like most women, haha). Everything happened so quickly I am unsure of what day it was, but I am going to say Friday....something was seriously wrong. She wanted to sleep all day and night. She didn't want to sit with me. When I loved on her, she didn't get up. She acknowledged me but she didn't get up from where she was laying. She then would go and lay in the bathroom on the toilet lid and not come out. I began to get a little worried. I checked her food and water and realized that I hadn't given her any food since we had gotten back from vacation on the 6th....and it didn't look like she had eaten any while we were away. I grew even more worried.
Late that night she was lying on the bathroom floor, curled in a ball and she looked so weak and pitiful. I gave her some raw hamburger trying to get her to eat something. I got excited that she ate a few nibbles so I quickly got her more. She didn't even touch it. I got her some water and she took a few licks and when I checked back on her, her nose was just resting in the bowl. I text Matt and he said we would take her to the vet Monday. I told him that I didn't think she would make it until then.
Saturday comes and it is Caleb's birthday party day. It was such a fun day honoring a great young man. When I got back that evening and Matt left for work, I checked on Kyra. She was not doing well. She was laying on her side and her breathing was ragged. I tried to keep my composure because my daughter was getting ready for bed and I didn't want to upset her. She even said "Kyra doesn't look well, mom." and she grabbed a small blanket and covered her up.
After she went to bed, I text Matt and he said to try to find an emergency vet open. I love him. He hates animals....and yet he knew the pain I was in. I told him no. I knew she was dying and I just wanted to be with her and show her she was not alone. I put my pillow and blanket in the bathroom and laid down with her, all the time stroking her head and whispering to her. She was so cold. I prayed so hard that night. I told God to just take her. I didn't want her to be in pain. Then I prayed for healing because I didn't want to wake up without her. I didn't know what I wanted. I sat up, crying and wondering what I could do - if anything. As I sat there, Kyra mewed softly and took every ounce of strength she had to get up and she belly crawled to my lap. She then crawled into it and placed her paw on my hand and curled it twice as if to pet me. This moment couldn't be any more precious to me. Those of you that may think animals are just animals. Or that cats are impersonal and only snub their owners. Or maybe you hate cats all together. This moment couldn't have been any more meaningful or purposeful. She was saying good bye and she wanted nothing more than to be close to me.
I was determined to stay there until she passed away. I wanted her to pass away feeling the love of her owner. It was then that I noticed she had fleas. How had I not notice this before? She had a flea collar and I had dusted her and I flea controlled my dog for the past couple months - how had she gotten some? And there were quite a few and I realized that was her demise. I felt so guilty that I hadn't realized this sooner. I was angry that she was being eaten alive by these parasites. She couldn't even scratch them at that moment due to being so weak. And even though I knew she was dying, I had hope that she wouldn't. So I doused her with some of the best flea spray ever that the vet had given me a long time ago. I then felt bad because she was already cold and I wet her fur with this spray. I just didn't know what else to do. Do I just let her die or do I try to bounce her back? Deep down, I knew nothing I did would change the outcome. Honestly, I am not even sure it was the fleas....with cats it could be anything. But I had to have a reason...I had to have something to blame.
I had fallen asleep on the floor next to her and woken up sometime in the middle of the night and don't remember even going to bed. When I got up, I checked on her and she had made her way to Cheyenne's room. She was lying there, still and barely breathing. I gave her a scratch to let her know I was there then got ready and left for church. While I was at lunch, Matt called me and I immediately asked how she was doing. "That's why I called you." he had said. My heart sank. I was so determined to stay by her side until she passed the night before. I was even going to stay home from church but decided to go. And while I was gone, she passed away. Alone and without the love of her owner.
I shed a few tears as did my daughter. I kept my composure because we were with friends. Matt buried her for me and then met me in town to go to a movie. We didn't get home until right before he had to go to work. I thought I was doing well, considering. But as I walked into that house, I felt her gone. As I sat in my chair, she wasn't there in my lap. As I looked at the couch, she would never share it with me again. She was gone.
As I got up this morning, I knew I wanted to blog about it. I wanted to share her with the world. I cry as I type this. I still miss her and will every day. I will never find another cat as special as her and quite frankly, I don't know if I will even try.
God created animals to be companions first. When Adam was in the garden of Eden, God gave him the animals. However, He knew that man needed more than animals to be companions so He created Eve. Animals are our family.
People make jokes about cats. Cats are hated by many and yet dogs are adored. I have a dog and I love him dearly but he is just a dumb dog. All of his mannerisms are taught. He loves me and I him, don't get me wrong but with Kyra it was so much more than that. There is no connection spiritually between me and him. I love him and he is great but he isn't her.
I know some people may read this and think "why blog about it?". I wanted to share my love for her. I typed it with a heavy heart and through tears to let the world know how great she truly was. Some will think I am silly. Perhaps I am. I know this - she was special to me. She was my baby girl and when you have something that special in your life, it isn't by coincidence.
So, I pray that God has a special cat up there that can't wait for me to get home.
I often would wake up to this.
She is in our computer desk as I sit at the computer - she was never far from me.
She often slept like this on my lap - I will miss you, Kyra.
Playing in the toilet - this was actually taken 2 days before she passed. It all happened so quickly.
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